Helping you both work towards solving your differences and becoming closer to each other
Working with 2 people in their most intimate of relationships takes careful thought and lots of getting to know each other. We work with our couples both pre and post marriage, short- and long-term relationships to guide them back to the place when they were at their best. We don't say what is right or wrong nor do we take a side but we do help both parties to communicate more effectively and to work with you on what needs you have and discuss how these are being met in the relationship.
We know from our extensive work with families and couples that in order for these to function healthily there needs to be a little bit of compromise, not too much and lots of understanding from each other as to the needs both people have. When we stop doing this resentment sinks in and things start to drift. This drift is an area we look at and help you to discuss what needs to either change, start or stop to bring you both closer together.
Our programs last an average of 12 sessions, typically but this can vary on each couple and the challenges they are facing. We cover intimacy, communication and trust, family and friends and power and control over the course of the programme.
This is an introduction to some of the work we do with couples and families to help them understand any potential for conflict in the relationship. The animation identifies several roles that anyone of us can play and what they mean.
Have a think about this along with any other areas you feel are causing you difficulties in your relationship right now.
Working with the relationship between two people can support both sides of the partnership in many ways. What we become in a relationship as a couple is sometimes far from what we are as individuals. What we aim to do in this therapy is help you both find where you may have become lost in that self-image.
Looking at what is going on for you both now and helping you find out what it is you feel is missing, changed or perhaps something you haven't yet found. Relationship therapy or marriage counselling can be an opportunity for someone trained to understand more about the difficulties that couples experience. Working within a warm, confidential and professionally focused environment, conflicts can often be resolved, rifts repaired, and trust re-established. Through this safe therapeutic relationship comes the possibility for lasting change.
Our role as your couple’s therapist is to help you build that picture back of what it was that bought you both together. Do you remember these moments, the feelings you may have once had.
Couples work is an ideal opportunity to talk through these together with the help of a therapist. We can support you in either relationship coaching or through deeper exploration in a more therapeutic way. Therapy is a partnership between both sides of the relationship.
Both of you along with your therapist contribute to the process. You cannot do all the work of recovery by yourself. Neither can a therapist do it for you. Therapy should feel like a joint venture, working together for the same common goal. A therapist can guide you and make suggestions. You trust each other in these important and personal discussions and eventually you can make the changes needed to move forward and feel happier.
Many marriage problems (especially in more "mature" marriages) flow from financial disputes and insecurities in the home. This can be difficult to support especially when there is lack of employment or sudden loss in income. Our mediation service counsellors are often in a good position to analyse finances, understand legal options, and assist you both in finding concrete solutions to financial problems. On occasion, it may be helpful to use an independent financial advisor (IFA) to identify the source of conflict and offer neutral independent advice.
Mediators who are psychotherapists and counsellors can be extremely helpful in assisting couples in distress. It is preferable that the mediator be experienced in divorce mediation. Often a couple will see a mediator at the same time they are seeing a couples' counsellor or are seeing a therapist individually. Some solicitors and divorce lawyers work very closely with mental health professionals in their practice of mediation, collaborative divorce or separation agreements. This collaboration between professions offers couples opportunity for healing, teaching coping and conflict resolution skills. We have several local legal services we work in conjunction with to support you should this be necessary.
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